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Happy Birthday to the light of my life, my darling Zevie girl. My heart aches with the heaviness of separation from you. The tears are hot and bitter. And yet, this day thirteen years ago was full of so much joy. My world is forever changed because you came into it. Thank you for being my bright star. I treasure the love we share in my heart always.

Today is also the first day in months that I have sat and sobbed, fully feeling the sorrow in my heart. Attempting to imagine you at thirteen is difficult and yet at the same time I feel I know exactly who you would be – fierce, sweet, thoughtful, brilliant, hard-working, gorgeous and full of passion for life. All the qualities you always embodied, only older and taller.

Looking at photos of us together and ones of you brought me to my knees this morning. I miss having you here to shower with love. I miss watching you engage with the world, devour knowledge in your quest to learn. I miss hugging you tight and kissing your soft skin. I miss you so much if I concentrate on it one hundred percent, I fear I shall break under the weight of separation.

My love for you never wanes; it is as constant as the rising and setting of the sun and as deep as the vast blue oceans.

Remembering and honoring you always,

Mom

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One Comment

    • First NameDiane Probert
    • Posted September 15, 2013 at 6:34 pm
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    Caitlin,      I had to read this several times to get it in my head that you were writing about Zev’s age and not the date. I cannot believe the picture  in my mind of a little tiny girl would be 13 now. This must such an emotional time for you with Zev’s Birthday and getting ready for your baby to arrive. I will say a prayer for you for strength and comfort. Hugs, Diane  

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